Mom


On the verge of becoming one myself (currently gestating a little one of my own) I feel the need to stop and  think about mom and what motherhood is all about.

I called mom today to wish her ‘Happy Mother’s Day’, but rather tentatively. It seems arbitrary to have just one day to celebrate someone so essential to my life. And I suppose it’s because she’s trained me well that I was so tentative; growing up she always said how silly it was to celebrate just that day, because she knew we loved and cared for her all year long. But here’s the thing, we actually do need this day. We need this day to remind ourselves to step back from whatever busy work we’re doing and think about mom and hopefully not just go through the motions of buying a card and flowers.

That brings to mind one example of what motherhood is: selflessness.

I’m not sure I’m ready to commit to that. I consider myself to be rather selfish. Up until now I have not had to really think about anyone else but myself. Sure, we love and care for our friends and family, we send them cards and give them gifts on the days designated to celebrate them, we do thoughtful things for them when we are so inspired…but we don’t do it EVERY DAMN DAY. That’s what moms do. Every day they wake up and devote themselves to their family, tired, sore, sick, hungry, whatever, there is never a day off. That is dedication. That is selflessness.

 

That sounds like a lot of work!

 

So number two, motherhood is not for slackers! Moms work HARD. Me thinks there is not a day when mom gets to roll over in bed and say, “I’ll just sleep in today, catch up on some TV watching and order take out…I’ll do groceries another day….the baby can feed itself, right?” I fear this aspect so very much. What if I do not have the stamina?

I turned to Nat in bed the other night and I said, “We can always just return him/her if it doesn’t work out, right?”

And we grinned, paused and then laughed, while in our heads we were thinking “We can’t return the baby! We CAN’T return the baby!!!”

Number three, being fearful, unsure, but doing it anyway: courageous motherhood. There’s no school for it, not even a licensing process. Moms learn by doing; by hitting the ground running. I am so grateful that my mom was a fast learner and a bold innovator in child rearing. I imagine when she didn’t know something she used all the resources available to her to figure it out, or she made it up- and look how great we turned out!

As a mom-to-be the question that arises is: can I do this? Which is to say, will I screw up? Is it possible to fail? And if so, what does a pass look like? What is success in motherhood?

Mom is the example because I think she passed with flying colours. First off she birthed me and Vieve with all fingers and toes intact- success number one (amazing how this is an overriding concern in pregnancy even though it is essentially out of my hands)!

But seriously, I think it’s this: that I know that I am loved 100% of the time regardless of whether we’ve talked just yesterday or two weeks ago. That if I have a problem, like an illness or an emotional issue I can talk to mom about it, all of it with nothing held back; and she will dispense wisdom I may or may not have heard before but is always music to my ears. And even when the phone has been put back in its cradle (yes, a cradle- she does not have a cell), I know that mom is still thinking about ways she can help and advise and will most likely call me again to fill in the gaps in the wisdom she dispensed the first time round. She’s always in my corner, even if her opinion is contrary to mine.

I look forward to family gatherings and mom time. I do not fit into the typical story of ‘oh gosh, we’ve got to visit family, let’s figure out how to make our exit as soon as possible’; no, I want to stay for as long as I possibly can. When I do have to go it is with a lump in my throat the size of a watermelon. That’s success in motherhood. That is all mom.

 

I only hope that I can be something approaching that for my little one.

 

Mom, I’m gonna need your help.

 

To my selfless, non-slacking, courageous mother: I love you.

 

LynkserWeek 23 054

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The Heir Apparent: Air Plants


Anyone who has read a few of my previous posts related to plants knows that I love succulents. They are beautiful and for the most part easy to keep alive ( provided they have the right soil to start with and do not get some random plant disease). I like having plants around, but I don’t like having plants that demand too much of my time. If they can’t learn to survive with a little bit of neglect…well…they’re toast.

Enter the air plant. What?!? Why have I not discovered them earlier? I knew they existed, remember my aunts having a few when I was a kid, but never considered getting my own.

My interest was piqued when I saw a beautifully tendrilled green plant, sans earth, sitting on the counter top by the cash register at my local nursery. I asked a few questions about it but didn’t buy it. Then I saw it in a few more shops, sometimes just as decor enhancements. Suddenly I was hooked on the idea of getting a few. When my sister visited me a few months ago we stumbled on a shop that had a few for sale and I picked some up.

This is how you care for it:

#1. Place in filtered not direct sunlight, indoors.

#2. Spritz with water once a week and set it upside down for a few minutes to make sure water beads don’t collect on its leaves. ( If you want to get away with watering even less, put your plant in a bathroom where shower steam aids hydration)

#3. There is no number three, THAT’S IT!!

 

I’ve since ogled a few more exotic looking air plants and added them to my collection. The really fun part is finding vessels to hold them. Your local thrift shop is a great place to find unique and cheap glassware.

thrift ship glassware, 50 cents a piece.
thrift ship glassware, 50 cents a piece.
Gorgeous, mini, fuchsia air plant
Gorgeous, mini, fuchsia air plant
a tall, cylindrical glass vase is great for the leggy ones.
a tall, cylindrical glass vase is great for the leggy ones.

air plants and belly pics 007

This one is my favorite. It's  ball shaped and fits perfectly in this min fish bowl
This one is my favorite. It’s ball-shaped and fits perfectly in this min fish bowl
I found this cool looking metal goblet which fits this air plant perfectly
I found this cool looking metal goblet which fits this air plant perfectly

Rhino Dung Magic


So, as it turns out, rhino dung is fantastic. Mixed in with the existing soil in proved to be the perfect environment for our lovely veggie garden. I’ve harvested two bok choi crops, tons of lettuce and some chard. The ones I planted in the planters..not so good. Probably too confined, and no rhino dung in those so of course they’re inferior! Garden March 2013 004

Garden March 2013 008

yumptious peas
yumptious peas

 

lettuce that doubles in size every time I harvest a few leaves.
lettuce that doubles in size every time I harvest a few leaves.

 

arugula gargantua - exponential growth each time I harvest. I'm drowning in the stuff
arugula gargantua – exponential growth each time I harvest. I’m drowning in the stuff

 

chard
chard

 

We’ve also dig up another patch of ground, not a raised bed, in which we are going to plant the veggies that no animals tend to dig up, i.e. zucchini and spring onions. We’re also starting some tomatoes for that little plot.

newly dug bed, also featuring rhino dung!
newly dug bed, also featuring rhino dung!

Slowly but surely our garden grows, by both senses of the meaning. Our backyard is still monstrously huge and could stand another bed. The question is whether we can afford the water bill to sustain said garden beds. We plan on mulching with hay or sawdust in an attempt to trap the moisture. Let’s hope it works.

my man going on a weeding-fest right after a rain - best time to do it!
my man going on a weeding-fest right after a rain – best time to do it!

 

It Begins Anew


So, the hubby was home this weekend – the WHOLE weekend which was a true miracle as he usually works. So we decided to put in some time on the house. Our master bedroom is now completely sheet-rocked, our tub re-caulked for the third time (don’t ask), we have a treasure trove of great tiles from the Re-Store for our bathroom remodel(half off on tiles that day!)  and…we started a garden!

It had to be done. We have a massive back yard. So big that we are completely overwhelmed and don’t know where to start with the landscaping. Especially landscaping on a budget. So, we thought, the one thing that was doable was re-assembling the planter box we’d taken from our previous garden at our old rental. Hubby had gotten two loads of composted rhino dung from work (he’s a guide at a place called Safari West here in Nor Cal) so we tossed that in and then went to our local garden center to pick up some regular soil to mix in and did a little cheating by buying our veggies already sprouted. Insta -garden!

lettuce of two varieties
lettuce of two varieties

 

 

arugula!
arugula!

 

bok choi
bok choi

Since we have no idea what rhino dung can do, we were afraid it might just kill the plants, so as a back-up I also planted a few veg in some little planters with regular soil.

planter with lettuces, arugula, bok choi and rainbow chard
planter with lettuces, arugula, bok choi and rainbow chard

 

snap peas
snap peas

Et voila! It was just about he easiest thing we could have done to feel like we were moving forward on making the yard our own.

voila!
voila!

Interior Decorating for Dummies, *emphasis on Dummy*


new home 016

I’m an artist, so I should know about colour, right?

Wrong.

News flash: interior decorating is nothing like painting on a canvas. I know…a house is just as much a blank canvas as a real canvas for the creative soul…but this creative soul is having a dark tea-time of the soul as regards colour choice for our house.

For the past couple of weeks I’ve been trying to re-invent our space, which, when we moved in was awash with a sort of piss-tinted hue throughout the entire house (A+ for consistency I suppose), not to mention a musty, smoker-lived-here smell that we were anxious to exorcise. I happily ran down to our local  hardware store, spent a few puzzled/overwhelmed  minutes gazing at paint chips ( like a kid in a non-edible candy store you might say) before going with a gut instinct for a grey-blue tone.

Excellent. No problemo. The colour went on magnificently, only it was a little too subtle. “Dang!, I knew it!” I muttered under my breath. At the last moment I had let my husband cloud my judgement and went a shade lighter than I’d wanted to. Needless to say, though we liked the colour, we agreed it was too light and  ended up repainting. No real problem, but additional time was required.

Then it came time to paint the hallway. I didn’t want a repeat of the last time. I wanted to go bold. I have this gorgeous Laotian tapestry we picked up years ago in Thailand and working from those colours I decided to boldly go purple. Crazy, I know. But I felt it in my gut, this was going to work and I would consult no one. Purity of vision and all that.

paint chips and Loatian tapestry
paint chips and Laotian tapestry

A trip to the hardware store, an unwavering finger proudly pointing at my colour swatch with the command of, “mix this”  and four hours of painting later (I could have bought the $2 sample and painted a wall, but why go the wussy way?) my hallway looked….well, it looked like …a cut of pastrami had exploded on my walls. A mix between gaudy easter purple and say, SPAM…or as my sister-in-law put it, “sort of intestinal”. Yeah, that’s what I was going for.

Back to the drawing board. Back to the paint aisle where a helpful fellow wanna-be interior decorator gave me tips on the trendiness of brown and blue after overhearing my discussion with my sister-in-law…until she saw the colour swatch I was working with already and a look of horror edged into her expression and an “oh” escaped her lips, like “oh, that kind of blue, well then there’s no colour that will go with that“, that kind of “oh”.

When all else fails, stick with the colour you’ve got and just go with shades ( I don’t know that that is a design thing, but I have a gut feeling I’m right). So that’s what I did;  a bolder shade of the existing colour. And you know what, I love it and so does hubby. In my books, that’s a success.

This interior decorating is harder than I thought. When you make a mistake, you can’t just paint over it with a big brush and a few strokes, no, you’ve got to cut in (gack) and roll for hours.

And gut instinct that works when painting on canvas does not necessarily work for painting walls. Lesson learned. I could benefit from reading a few decorating books.


After all the frustration, it is at last resolved. Now it’s time to sit back with my Winter Spiced Ale and enjoy.

new home 024

..while sitting on my Craigslist find…new home 019 Not bad, eh? But I’d still put me down more in the dummy column when it comes to decor. However, I do shoot half decent photos. So enjoy the illusion of a magazine ready home (hint: it’s all in the cropping!):

new home 022
our fireplace, now painted white with the blue-grey accent wall complete.

new home 020

Finished hallway.
Finished hallway.

Yes, Hello! I’m Still Here!


I’ve been feeling immense guilt at having not posted in over a month. I was in the midst of a move, and blogging about creativity was far from my mind. That’s not to say that I haven’t been creative. I’m lucky to have a job that requires creativity on a daily basis, so that even if I am not creating at home, I am creative at work. I have some great “Keep It Simple Genius” recipes I will be posting soon. Right now, I thought I’d share some photos.

Photography is something I’ve been away from for quite some time. I’ve been meaning to get back in the saddle but have not been inspired to take the ol’ camera out of the saddle bag as it were. Then I was asked to photograph a fundraising event at my local art center. The event is called the Soup-er Bowl ( get it? ) which leads to no end of confusion when said verbally without the benefit of seeing the pun. It’s my favourite event because it involves ceramic bowls and soup – LOTS of soup. My sister would approve as she is a soup junky. Basically, you pay $45 and you get to choose a bowl that’s been hand-made by one of the students ( my mother-in-law makes amazing bowls!) and then you taste up to 14 different soups from local restaurants and vote on the best one. I treat it like an Olympic sport. Have you ever tried to eat 14 different soups at a sitting? It is tres difficile. But I’m usually up to the challenge – it’s called a muumuu and no food all day leading up.

This time around I was simply the photographer. As sad as it was to not participate in the yumminess, I was freed to just focus on getting the shots.

The lighting was tough – mixed lighting (mostly halogen)  in a dim, cavernous room at night. My flash unit wasn’t working because I had an accident with a leaking battery that killed it. Aargh! So, I had to rely on a steady hand, highest ISO I could use without too much noise and a wide open aperture at f 5.6

Sorry if a bit of photography speak snuck out and made you blank out momentarily (the photographer in me).

I was nervous about doing documentary photography. So much happens at the same time it’s hard to know where to be and how to choose the shot. If you lose the moment it’s gone. Not to mention that I’m shy about being all up in peoples’ grill. It’s not really my forte, but I tried to relax and just have fun with it. I even got up on a stool in the middle of the crowd to get  better perspective. I was surprised to discover that people just forget that you’re there (so much so I had to make sure they didn’t knock me from my stool). I can’t say that I had a break-out, spectacular, Henri Cartier Bresson-esque photographic moment, but I was pleased. Here are the results:

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Creativity in the Midst of Chaos


A whole month has slipped by with nary a post. When faced with slew of stresses, work and life related, I have a hard time staying creative let alone document and write about it. Excuses, excuses, I know. So, to show that I am not in a complete creative dry spell, I’m posting a pic of the work I’ve recently completed: cat and dog Christmas cards. I discovered that, while painting was almost too involved in the midst of all the things I’m dealing with, drawing is something I can do quite easily; all I need is paper and a ballpoint pen. I’m very happy with the results. This past Saturday I had these for sale at the farmer’s market  for the first time. It opened a whole new can of worms with regards to requests for specific breeds, of which there are way too many to draw and have printed – but that is a whole other story.

These are the originals before they headed to the printers to be made into cards:

 

 

 

I’m quite happy with them…and crossing my fingers that others are too and want to buy them, or else I’ll be swimming in cards for the next couple of years and acquaintances will grow tired of the yearly pet Christmas card!

 

S